Like one of my favorite Salvador Dali quotes states, “Have no fear of perfection, you will never reach it”. In today’s world of being a mom/parent there is this immense pressure to reach this unattainable “perfection”. It’s almost as if everyone seems to be trying to achieve or portray that they’re achieving. For instance, say I take my children to the playground (which I am about to do here shortly) and I’m following my 17-month old around certain areas that I feel she isn’t quite ready for on her own. There will be moms who judge me for being “helicopter-like” but if I go ahead and allow her to do things like the small twisty slide by herself there will most likely be mothers judging me for not being cautious enough. This can all happen in a matter of minutes at the playground. If I brought too many snacks or too little. If they’re healthy enough snacks or not. If I discipline them too much or too little.

The fact is, in today’s world the pressures of being a mother are really unnecessary and invalid. We all know our own kids best and we are the best mom/parent for our child. Therefore, whether we coddle too much or need more space from our child may not have anything to do with our personality but just as much theirs. My son is not a cuddler, he’s loving but just not touchy feely as much with me. My daughter is a cuddle bug. She wants to snuggle mama all day. But, when it comes to independence my son needs more direction and attention, my daughter is perfectly content doing her own thing and likes it that way. They are two different people, and I am a different person from them. We do what works best for us. Period. Sorry that you don’t approve of my style Susan, but I’m not you and that’s all you need to know 🙂

Ugh. But seriously let me just take a moment or ten to vent about this thorn in my side otherwise known as moms who think they’re “better than others”. I do realize that these projections come from a place of deeply seeded insecurity but its no less irritating to me to be around anyone who thinks they’re “better” or that their kids are “better” than yours.

We’re all in this mother/parent hood thing together yet some people just sit on their high horses as if they and/or their offspring can do no wrong. They live “perfect” lives and fart unicorn rainbows, apparently.

I really try not to let it piss me off but of course I’ll admit I’m not perfect and have moments that it bothers me more than others, I guess. What makes you think that you are so much better? What makes you think that your kid is so much better? We all come with strengths and weaknesses, we all do things that are not so great. So tell me again why you think you’re so effing perfect? Why do you think you’re so much better than me, her, or whoever?

It must be exhausting trying to be perfect all of the time. It is so much more liberating to just enjoy life more and know that if your kids are happy, healthy, and fed that none of the rest matters. It’s a joy stealer to try and attain this “perfection” that doesn’t exist. On the outside any home can seem perfect but once you step inside and get to the real you’ll see that no one is perfect and no one’s life is perfect. The ones who pretend it is usually have the most messed up situations they just hide it better sometimes. You drive by a picket fence cookie cutter two plus car garage home with a yard and think they have it made, you can look on social media and see filtered and picture perfect lives being represented but do you really know what demons this people may really be facing, the loneliness and need for approval of others, the falseness that they have to uphold in order to feel good about themselves?

So while everyone does stage their photos at times or acts like they have it all together – We’re all struggling to stay afloat in this crazy boat called motherhood. We’re all hot messes – some just hide it better. Some just really live in a fantasy world thinking they’re perfect – boy are they sadly mistaken!

No one is perfect. Not us, not our kids, not our husbands, not our parents. Not even those strangers we follow on social media. No one. But we can all try to do and be better every day. Just as long as you’re not trying to be better than anyone but yourself.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s