My life is the personification of unfinished projects right now.
This blog for instance, is just a work-in-progress. I am not consistent with it, nor do I have anything planned out – It’s all on a whim.
Much like my thoughts throughout the day, my dishes, laundry, and household in general is just a culmination of unfinished projects. Never in my life have I ever felt more ADD then I do now after having kids.
That rare moment that I get to have an adult conversation with a friend, my mom, etc. I am constantly saying, “what was I saying?” or “what were we talking about?” after calming the many fires that start around here throughout the day. Whether it’s my toddler needing attention or help with something or my baby daughter needing mama for something – the entire day is full of interrupted intentions.
That is why if you walked through my front door right now you would see: a sink half full of dishes that I’ve been trying to tackle all week (because it never ends) you would also see clean but unfolded laundry spilling over the ottoman in our master, pictures that I developed but have never made it onto the walls or into photo albums so they just sit there in a pile waiting to be organized. Then, there’s my internet browser that consists of an array of different google searches, carts full of purchases I probably won’t ever buy, and downloads of PDF files that I still haven’t saved (maybe I’ll do that now while I’m thinking about it). Among many many other things that I started but never finished.
This blog post came about today while I was taking a what is my purpose in life quiz?
While I was writing down my answers and self-reflecting I came up with the idea of this post and simultaneously had an epiphany moment.
One of the things I’m supposed to do in this life is share my thoughts. I have always been an expressive person, and I have always enjoyed doing so through writing and/or music.
This search to find my purpose still continues, but I feel that I am getting closer. My goals in life have always been to help others through self-expression. Whether it be through music or writing I don’t know but those have always been my greatest passions and if I could find a way to utilize the two in a way that speaks to my soul then I think that would truly make me the happiest.
We shall see, but in the mean time I will still continue to write because it truly makes me feel better and if just one person in the world can relate and not feel alone then I know my job is successful because that is really all I ever want. To help someone else know that they are not alone, they are not the only one feeling certain ways. We all tend to get in our own heads at times and it takes seeing others going through similar things to help us realize that we aren’t crazy – we are completely normal and it’s okay to be vulnerable, it’s okay to be imperfect, it’s okay to have a house full of unfinished projects – because we are parents, we are busy, and we too are still trying to find our place in this world.